For those of you who find regular stalking too time-consuming, there’s now a Facebook application called Breakup Notifier which will inform you when the relationship status of specific Facebook friends has changed. I suppose there are a few legitimate reasons to use this app, but most of the ones I can think of are pretty shady.
Editor’s Note: Upon publication of this article, the Breakup Notifier has been blocked by Facebook due to T.O.S. violations.
On one hand, you might have friends whose significant others you don’t approve of (or outright hate) and are certain the relationship won’t last. By choosing to be notified of their relationship status, you can be informed when they finally break up, so you can hang out with your friend again without their pesky boyfriend/girlfriend ruining your fun.
Of course, there’s always the worst case scenario, which would be when you get that status update saying they’ve just gotten married or engaged.You can also track your single friends, the ones you know deserve someone special, and then be updated when they’ve finally landed somebody. If you’re already in a relationship, it’s also an easy way to find who’s now available for double-dating.
On the other hand, though, I see this app being targeted more toward stalker-types. Rather than simply disapproving of who your friends are dating, perhaps you’re more concerned that who they’re dating isn’t you. Install this app and be notified when they’re single again, at which point you can instantly message them in an oh-so-creepy way mere seconds after they’ve changed their status from “in a relationship” to “single”. They’re sure to realize how much you care for their well-being and instantly decide to date you on the rebound. Or, more likely, they’ll notice you for the predatory creep who’s been waiting months for this chance. But hey, there’s nothing to lose other than your dignity!